New Mercies

"My mercies are new each morning."

That is a line that is repeated in His song over me. He has to remind me. It is the line that connects the dots of my days. It gives hope and meaning to each crisis. It dispels all doubt. He is teaching deep inside me how to be patient, how to be satisfied, how to find joy in trials and consider and declare myself blessed.

Count it all joy, my brethren, when you meet various trials, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives to all men generously and without reproaching, and it will be given him. James 1:2-5

I want to be found faithful. I want to wait upon God with full expectancy and joy in everything He has given. Not looking to tomorrow for happiness, but pleased with this day and knowing His mercies are new each morning.

The first week my sister, Shonna, an RN stayed beside Ely continually for that extra medical care during such a critical time. God positioned her there, and she assisted her resuscitation several times during that week. The doctors didn't expect her to make it. We expected God to show up and to sustain her. He did.

I remember laying in the waiting room floor which turned into a makeshift bunkhouse at night for all the ICU family members. The Holy Spirit spoke loud and clear to my heart on the morning of Feb. 14th, His mercies are new each morning. I saw the sun rising through the large glass windows. The cloak of darkness thrown off. I was filled with certain HOPE. My daughter lived through the night, and He wouldn't leave us. Each morning we awake, He is waiting. God let that be the first thought of my day.

He reminds me still that He will not leave us. He is the Bright and Morning Star that rises inside of the fears and questions throwing off the cloak of darkness and uncertainty. Jesus, you are the HOPE. Let me know you more, LORD. I want to be faithful and KNOW first whatever you have is right... I pray that knowledge fills me completely.

The night of the 14th, I lay praying in the floor knowing He was in charge, and yet some part of me still shook inside of the uncertainty. I didn't know what was going to happen, I believed Ely would live, but something else still remained. I took all of that junk to Him in two words, "Oh, God..." He met me there and walked me through the outcomes: what if she remains in a coma-- I trust you, Lord; what if she comes home tonight with Me-- I trust you, Lord; what if ... and I sat up on all fours, and I said, "BUT I KNOW YOU." In that moment, He showed me Ely bringing fishes and loaves to him. He said, "With what Ely brings me, I will feed multitudes."

He is still feeding the hungry crowd of concerns inside of me. The starving "what ifs" standing in the soup-line.

Let your mercies fall-- shower them down..